Where I stood
by summergirlforever
Summary: There is love of course. And then there's life, its enemy. A sad one shot Romy featuring Rogue / Anna and Remy Lebeau aka Gambit with hints of Logan, Bobby and Storm. Hope you like it XMen rule!


I don't know what I've done

_I don't know what I've done_

Remy Lebeau slid down against the wall adjacent to the door that had just been slammed in his face, his head falling into his hands.

_  
Or if I like what I've begun_

A realisation had dawned upon him the moment he heard his fathers voice offer a sorrowful greeting through the receiver, he could never escape the past. Heavens known he had tried.

_  
But something told me to run_

The last time he had left his beloved New Orleans he had sworn upon his soul that he would never again return, that he would never look back, and he never had. He had come to New York and he had met her.

_  
And honey you know me it's all or none  
_

The hottest love has the coldest end, so few words had never before wrung truer. They were a force of nature, their heat and passion scorching. They were soulmates.

_  
There were sounds in my head  
Little voices whispering_

She had never believed in love, or life for the matter. Hope, she had never dared to, it had seemingly forsaken her life, until he came. He changed her world, he changed her. The girl that had kept her heart locked away had allowed it to be stolen by the Cajun thief, and she didn't mind.

_  
That I should go and this should end  
Oh and I found myself listening  
_

Her legs collapsed beneath her against the doorframe as she fell to the floor and fought to breathe.

_  
'Cos I don't know who I am, who I am without you  
All I know is that I should  
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you  
All I know is that I should  
'Cos she will love you more than I could  
She who dares to stand where I stood_

See I thought love was black and white

It had never been simple for then, but fate held these two southerners so tightly wound together.

_  
That it was wrong or it was right_

Cocky and arrogant had turned to charming and endearing to her. Untouchable and sarcastic had become physical and undeniable to him.

_  
But you ain't leaving without a fight_

_Flashback_

'Just go Remy … please … ah can't …' as Rogue brought the palm of her hand to harshly wipe away the evidence of her agony.

'I can't' He firmly gripped her shoulders and shaking her in a desperate attempt to convey his own inner torment, then softly and forsaken whispering 'I can't'.

His head lowered and swiftly his lips captured hers, pouring all the desperation, love, lust and love, all his love that he could give to her into that one, final soul searing kiss.

He was pushed away by a push to his chest, his eyes blinking in confusion as he saw her disappear.

_  
And I think I am just as torn inside  
_

Life or death, it had come to rest upon him. The fate of his family, their lives, their blood, the responsibility to secure their survival fell to him. And the cost? Himself forsaken, torn from heaven to descend into hell. He would have stayed, but she wouldn't allow it. The cost was more than her soul could bear. And so in the end, she had made him let her let him let her go.

_  
'Cos I don't know who I am, who I am without you_

Their eyes connected, the congratulatory applause numbed by the depth of emotion passing between the two broken hearted southerners.

_  
All I know is that I should_

Her eyes blinked away from his and down to the gently hand that now rested upon her, a heart breakingly sad smiled offered by her to its owner.

_And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you_

He couldn't stand it, and yet he couldn't look away. The congratulatory applause buzzing within the church, the tight grasp of his wife's hands clasped on his arm, it was all numb to him because it was wrong. It was all wrong.

_All I know is that I should_

Her gaze refocused upon his unwavering one, tears staining her cheeks as she desperately fought for composure.

_Flashback_

'_He will never be more lost to you than he is now, let him go Anna (_he slowly encased her hands in his before bringing them to his lips and offering a small kiss in an act of consolation_) … for the sake of both your souls'. _

Jean Lucs words reverberated clearly in her mind as she stole a glance towards the woman to whom she had lost her life. Remy's gaze followed hers before crimson stained eyes once again locked with emerald as he made to move towards her. She shook her head and stepped back bringing his intended move to a halt, the connection never severed.

_'Cos she will love you more than I could  
She who dares to stand where I stood  
_

It was over.

_  
And I won't be far from where you are if ever you should call_

Storm was the first of the Xmen to approach him, her soulful eyes conveying the depth of her love and understanding. She embraced him tightly, giving to him the only comfort she had offer. And Remy clung to her, willing his face not to betray him to the gathered congregation that stood not far from her.

_You meant more to me than anyone I ever loved at all_

Remy fingered the tattered Queen of Hearts that rested in his trouser pocket. She had given it back to him, he had refused but she had been insistent. Severing all ties. Creating distance. It was excruciating. And yet, it was all he had left.

_But you taught me how to trust myself and so I say to you_

Rogue and Bobby sat on a worn bench not to far from the offending scene, her head resting on his shoulder with his arms encircling her, a useless comfort he knew, but it was all he had. He hated that man. He had stolen her heart only to break it. He gently tightened his hold on her as she buried her face into his chest to suppress the overwhelming flow of tears that now she could no longer contain.

_This is what I have to do  
_

Darkness had fallen, Belladonna was upstairs waiting for him, an allurement to almost any man, and yet Remy LeBeau, Prince of Thieves, and Cajun Charmer sat with an almost empty bottle of Bourbon beside him staring out into the shadows that were encroaching upon the sunset.

A strong hand settled on his shoulder, his brother Henri soon emerged in his vision.

'I don't know what to do without her Henri'

It was the most truth that had ever been uttered by either brother. He couldn't lie and say in time it would get easier.

There was nothing to say.

_'Cos I don't know who I am, who I am without you  
All I know is that I should_

'Running again?'

Such a simple question from any other, but from him it was laced with a multitude of others.

Her head inclined towards him, a tender smile at his appearance.

'Ah'll be back, soon … maybe (in a sigh of exhaustion) I don't know Logan. (she glided towards him until they were barely a separate entity) I belong here, or at least ah did but … ah need tahme, ah can't stay when all I see is him, wherever I look he's there … and ah can't (she choked back a sob as he pulled her fiercely into his arms)

'Ah don't know who I am anymore'

_And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you  
All I know is that I should_

They both stood staring up into the empty sky, where the stars now ceased to shine. Two southerners, two lovers, two soulmates, separated by distance and circumstance and yet not by heart.

_  
'Cos she will love you more than I could  
She who dares to stand where I stood  
Oh, she who dares to stand where I stood_


End file.
